Is Christmas fun? Is it relaxing and heartwarming? It can be,
and maybe it should be, but is won't be if you're stressed out
from all the shopping and preparing and worrying whether your
Christmas is going to be 'perfect' enough.
So at Quotescoop.com we come to the rescue with a collection of
Christmas quotes and Christmas thoughts that may cheer you up
and – hopefully – make you relax and get in the right mood for
what CAN be the most heartwarming of seasons.
Let's Start out with 15 Really Short Quotes on Christmas
Blessed is the season which engages the whole world
in a conspiracy of love!
~ Quotes on Christmas by Hamilton Wright Mabie ~
There has been only one Christmas – the rest are
anniversaries.
~ W. J. Cameron ~
The best presents we can give each other are love and
attention.
~ Soren Lauritzen ~ , the Personal Development Guy
There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake
Christmas morning and not be a child.
~ Erma Bombeck ~
Christmas: Several weeks of Hell for Christ's sake!
~ Funny Christmas Quotes & Sayings ~
A hug is the perfect gift; one size fits all, and
nobody minds if you exchange it.
~ Funny Christmas Sayings ~
Christmas: make people forget the past with a present.
~ Funny Christmas Sayings ~
Hey Santa, how much for your list of naughty girls?
~ Funny Quotes about Christmas ~
Christmas is the season when you buy this year's gifts
with next year's money.
~ Funny Christmas Sayings ~
Christmas isn't a season. It's a feeling.
~ Edna Ferber ~
A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory,
like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.
~ Garrison Keillor ~
Something about an old-fashioned Christmas is hard to
forget.
~ Hugh Downs ~
You cannot receive what you don't give. Outflow
determines inflow.
~ Eckhart Tolle ~
They err who thinks Santa Claus comes down through the
chimney; he really enters through the heart.
~ Mrs. Paul M. Ell ~
The one thing women don't want to find in their
stockings on Christmas morning is their husband.
~ Joan Rivers ~
Famous Christmas Quotes for Your Entertainment
So much (for now) for the short Christmas sayings and funny
Christmas quotes – we'll top those off with a few famous
Christmas quotes. First, one from an American juggler, comedian,
actor and writer (and alcoholic) whose birth name was actually
William
Claude Dukenfield:
Christmas at my house is always at least six or seven
times more pleasant than anywhere else. We start drinking early.
And while everyone else is seeing only one Santa Claus, we'll be
seeing six or seven.
~ Famous Christmas Quotes by W.C. Fields ~
And secondly, this is one of those funny Christmas quotes that
require you to know a bit about film history. In this case the
fact that
famous actress Shirley Temple Black began her film career in
1932 at the tender age of four. (She was born 1928 to a father
who was businessman and banker in Southern California and a
mother who loved dancing – a fact that surely helped the young
girl succeed).
![]() printable family Christmas games |
I stopped believing in Santa Claus when my mother took me to see
him in a department store, and he asked for my autograph.
~ Shirley Temple ~
World famous Danish-born American entertainer Børge
Rosenbaum, better known as
Victor Borge
who was born in 1909 and died in 2000 loved to be with his
family, yet ever the entertainer, he had this to say:
Santa Claus has the right idea – visit people only once
a year.
~ Victor Borge ~
And, in a more serious and heartwarming vein, here's one of the
famous quotes about Christmas that was spoken by a U.S.
president –
the 30th
President of the United States (1923-29):
Christmas is not a time nor a season, but a state of
mind. To cherish peace and goodwill, to be plenteous in mercy,
is to have the real spirit of Christmas.
~ Calvin Coolidge ~
Here's another one of those famous quotes about Christmas that
keep you warm in a cold season, this one from a world famous
Scottish poet and novelist, Sir_Walter Scott:
Heap on the wood! – the wind is chill;
But let it whistle as it will,
We'll keep our Christmas merry still.
~ Walter Scott, Sr. ~
And, finally, a good handful of very famous Christmas quotes
from a British novelist who in some ways is actually synonymous
with Christmas,
Charles
John Huffam Dickens (1812-1870). Dickens lived and wrote
(e.g. the almost timeless 'A Christmas Carol' of 1843) during
the Victorian period, and he is generally considered one of the
greatest English novelists of that age:
I will honour Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it
all the year.
~ Charles Dickens ~ (from: 'A Christmas Carol')
There is nothing better than a friend, unless it is a
friend with chocolate.
~ Charles Dickens ~
Christmas was close at hand, in all his bluff and hearty
honesty; it was the season of hospitality, merriment, and
open-heartedness; the old year was preparing, like an ancient
philosopher, to call his friends around him, and amidst the
sound of feasting and revelry to pass gently and calmly away.
~ Charles Dickens ~ (from: 'The Pickwick Papers')
… for it is good to be children sometimes, and never
better than at Christmas …
~ Charles Dickens ~ (from: 'A Christmas Carol')
There is nothing in the world so irresistibly contagious
as laughter and good humor.
~ Charles Dickens ~ (from: 'A Christmas Carol')
I do come home at Christmas. We all do, or we all
should. We all come home, or ought to come home, for a short
holiday — the longer, the better — from the great boarding
school where we are forever working at our arithmetical slates,
to take, and give a rest.
~ Charles Dickens ~
A merry Christmas to everybody! A happy New Year to all
the world!
~ Charles Dickens ~
Some Christmas Thoughts and Questions that Make You Think
What do you want for Christmas? A friend, a lover, a Porche,
a yacht, success, fame and loads and loads of money. In short,
everything, right?
Okay, so this is one of the Christmas quotes that hints that
perhaps materialism does not satisfy the soul:
He who has not Christmas in his heart will never find it
under a tree.
~ Roy L. Smith ~
In fact, materialism doesn't even satisfy the feelings or the
mind. We all know that when people long for something – and
manage to get it – they will only want something more.
Most people are never satisfied with what they have already
obtained. There is always something more, something better that
they feel they must have. This is one of the basic functions of
our ego – that small part of us which most people assign way too
big a role in their lives, much to their own detriment.
Calvin: Well. I've decided I do believe in Santa Claus,
no matter how preposterous he sounds.
Hobbes: What convinced you?
Calvin: A simple risk analysis. I want presents. Lots of
presents. Why risk not getting them over a matter of belief?
Heck, I'll believe anything they want.
Hobbes: How cynically enterprising of you.
Calvin: It's the spirit of Christmas.
~ Bill Watterson ~ (from his 'Calvin and Hobbes'
comic strip)
You may stock up plenty of something, but still need still
more to complete what you have planned with the supply you have.
If you are collecting things that come in a set, you
won’t be satisfied until the complete set is in your
possession.
Then, when the entire set is in your possession … surprise,
surprise … you want the next set!
You spend your energy and health collecting, storing away.
When you have accumulated a lot of belongings, it is a lot of
work to store them and keep them neat. If you have too much
stuff, you cannot find what you want when you need it anyway,
what good is it?
If you got everything you ever wanted for Christmas …
where would you put it?
~ Christmas Thoughts ~
When you finally quit storing away, are you too ill or weak to
enjoy what you have stored?
Do you even have time to enjoy all your stuff? And when you're
gone, will your heirs and benefactors appreciate all your stuff
as much as you did? Will they sell it at a low price to get rid
of it? Will they throw it away? Was it all for nothing?
Here's the thing: Wanting never stops. In itself this is not a
problem … do you know when it is a problem and when it isn't?
There is a simple answer to that:
We all want something. All the time. If that want comes
from love – like wanting to realize your potential – there is no
problem. It is when what we want comes from fear and lack that
we go nuts and become a danger to ourselves, others and the
environment.
~ Soren Lauritzen ~ , the Personal Development Guy
A very merry Christmas
And a happy New Year
Let's hope it's a good one
Without any fear
~ John Lennon ~
Quotations about Christmas, Age and Santa Claus
'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through
the house
Not a creature was stirring – not even a mouse:
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.
~ Clement C. Moore ~
St. Nicholas, or Santa Claus as we prefer to call him today, is
actually a pretty modern invention, at least the way we know him
today: Big, burly, bearded and dressed in red.
Let's get Santa Claus … 'cause;
Santa Claus has a red suit
He's a communist
And a beard, and long hair
Must be a pacifist
What's in the pipe that he's smoking? Santa Claus comes in your
house at night.
He must be a dope fiend to get you up tight.
Why do police guys beat on peace guys?
~ Arlo Guthrie ~ (from: 'The Pause of Mr. Claus')
When you were a child, Santa looked really old. You were afraid
to sit on his lap at first! (You know, the guy dressed as Santa
– at home or in the department store).
There was the little boy who approached Santa in a
department store with a long list of requests. He wanted a
bicycle and a sled, a chemical set, a cowboy suit, a set of
trains, a baseball glove and roller skates.
"That's a pretty long list," Santa said
sternly. "I'll have to check in my book and see if you were a
good boy."
"No, no," the youngster said quickly. "Never
mind checking. I'll just take the roller skates."
~ Funny Stories and Quotes about Christmas ~
Then, when you grew to adulthood, maybe you dressed up like
Santa for your children. Then, one day, you looked at Santa and
he didn’t look old at all!
You know you are getting old when Santa starts looking
younger.
~ Robert Paul ~
There are three stages of man: he believes in Santa
Claus; he does not believe in Santa Claus; he is Santa Claus.
~ Bob Phillips ~
These are a couple of the funnier quotes about Christmas, how
true those Christmas quotations are! When Santa no longer looks
old to you, the kids driving cars look too young to have a
driver’s license! Yes, as far as we know, old age happens
to all of us. When you are young you don’t believe it
will happen to you.
In fact, you don’t even think about old age until it
happens.
The tragedy of old age is not that one is old, but that
one is young.
~ Oscar Wilde ~
When you are old, you pay for everything you did in your youth
that was not profitable for you or your body.
You know you're getting old when your back starts going
out more than you do.
~ Phyllis Diller ~
When you are young you may tend to think nothing bad can happen
to you – to others, yes – but not to you.
You may feel you are above all unfortunate happenstance. In
fact, you may even feel like you are better than others,
particularly those who are older than you. In time you will come
to see this is merely the ignorance (perhaps even the arrogance)
of youth.
If I knew I was going to live this long, I'd have taken
better care of myself.
~ Mickey Mantle ~
An older person usually cannot communicate to a younger person
what is to be so the youth can prepare for the sure future. If
they would only listen to the wisdom of old age! But no matter,
you will feel the exact same thing soon enough. 🙂
A Few Santa Claus Jokes
This page is coming to an end. We want to end it as we
started it, with a bunch of Christmas quotes, so that's what
we're going to do – only this time they're longer than in the
beginning, and we've thrown in a few good Christmas Jokes and
Santa Claus jokes as well:
There's something very fishy about a Santa Claus who not
only neglects to visit children in cultures based on, say,
Buddhism or Hinduism, but who also bestows his gifts based on
some highly questionable standards of 'good' children versus
'bad' children … with reality showing that children of rich
parents must obviously be much more 'good' than children of poor
parents.
~ Funny Santa Claus Jokes ~
Let's be naughty and save Santa the trip.
~ Gary Allan ~
It is the personal thoughtfulness, the warm human
awareness, the reaching out of the self to one's fellow man that
makes giving worthy of the Christmas spirit.
~ Isabel Currier ~
Good things come in small packages … and in big
packages, medium packages, pretty packages, ugly packages and
just plain boring packages. And you know what? It's not the
package that counts.
~ Soren Lauritzen, thePersonalDevelopmentGuy.com ~
Christmas! The very word brings joy to our hearts. No
matter how we may dread the rush, the long Christmas lists for
gifts and cards to be bought and given – -when Christmas Day
comes there is still the same warm feeling we had as children,
the same warmth that enfolds our hearts and our homes.
~ Joan Winmill Brown ~
You get what you give – multiplied. This is true both
for the farmer sowing seeds and for you doing deeds in the
world. But please note the order or sequence involved: You give
first, then you get.
~ Soren Lauritzen ~ , the Personal Development Guy
Dear Santa,
I'm writing to let you know that I've been naughty…
and it was worth it.
You fat, judgmental bastard!
~ Funny Santa Claus Jokes ~
Why is Christmas just like a day at the office? You do
all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
Christmas Jokes
Top Five Things To Say about A Christmas Gift You
Didn't Want
5. Wow. This is perfect for wearing around the basement.
4. Boy, if I had not recently shot up 4 sizes this would've fit.
3. If the dog buries this, I'll be furious!
2. To think – I got this the year I vowed to give all my gifts
to charity.
1. Gosh. I hope this never catches fire! It is fire season
though. There are lots of unexplained fires.
Where Would You Like to Go Next?
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Quotescoop's Christmas Poems – from Inspirational to
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A Collection of Free Printable Christmas Cards and Funny
& Vintage Christmas Cards & Christmas Card Greetings
Free Christmas Cards to Print – Antique Victorian +
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Humorous Reflections on Christmas
The Big Question: Is Santa Claus Real? Warm Santa Humor
and Santa Claus Jokes and Quotes
What Is Christmas Really? Formal, Funny, Friendly and
Feisty Answers to the Meaning of Christmas
Fun Games for Christmas
Fun Ideas for Christmas Games: Also Printable and Trivia
Activities
Funny and Entertaining Christmas Party Ideas and
Christmas Party Activities
Entertaining Christmas Party Games for the Whole Family
& Christmas Party Ideas for Kids and Adults
Funny Mental and Physical Office Christmas Party Games
for the Best Company Christmas Parties
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